Oh what a sight....

Hubby and I went for my first dating scan today...I was all so excited like all mothers to-be... I am not really of a slim build....he..he..he.. thanks to all the chips I've savoured all these years...When we were waiting, there was another lady waiting to be seen...SO just to be friendly, I asked her how long has she been pregnant...She said 30 weeks, and also said just like me.. and I was like what????? and explained..No..I'm just 10 weeks..it must be the fat.....How embarrassing was that?? 30 weeks? Maybe it's the way I sit..slouching is bad, man...But I don't blame her... I was looking quite big for a 10 week pregnant lady....So I immediately sit properly and shut my mouth...no further conversation......

We waited for more than 10 minutes before being called..and my bladder was really killing me.. I drank more than 1 liter of water before that....I was desperately need to go.....

So there was she....I can see her clearly..she kickboxed the minute the scanner touched my skin....it was a pretty sight and I didn't feel any need to go to the loo...I was relieved to see her...finally I am convinced!!! But the radiographer said she was too small for a 10 weeks baby.. she tought I was less than 10 weeks..so I was asked to come again after 3 weeks so to have another go...As usual, me being kiasu, I asked for 2 prints of the scan eventhough I will have to come again...

Something happened.....

Something happened yesterday….it scared me a lot…..I am now 10 wks pregnant and handling it not quite well…..the hormones really dominates me. I feel low all the time and certainly my appetite went cuckoo.. I have no appetite to eat (this came as a surprise as I used to be a big eater!!!!) I have been selfish.. my poor baby.. I hope this is only temporary… my midwife did tell me that there are mum-to-be survive only on porridge…so I guess I’m not that bad as I try to compensate with fruits…I now hate veggies.. they make me sick.. At one point, I felt like a little girl being forced to eat her veggies!!!! I cried like a baby!!! Foolish!

Not eating veggies and eat less finally taking its toll as Over the few days, I have been feeling funny, lightheaded, easily tired.. I blame myself! Worst nightmare a mum-to-be could face (I think) is having to found out that you’re bleeding! I got freaked out and didn’t know what to do.. called my mum but the line was engaged.. don’t want to bother hubby at work.. but the worry was too much for me to bear at that time, so called him and went to the hospital for a check up.. after a while, I thought, there’s nothing to worry about. Just be cool… so urine sample and blood was taken. so we waited for the doctor to come and do a scan on me… he brought a handheld scanner for the baby’s heartbeat… We can can’t hear anything and my eyes started to wet… he comforted me and said there’s nothing to worry about at this point of time and off we went for bigger and more accurate scanner…and there she was… I really can’t see her properly, but my hubby said he saw the heartbeat…so I guess she’s fine…

My first dating scan is scheduled on Monday so I guess, we just have to wait till monday to really see this little person inside me....I really can't wait...

A new life.....

It is a surreal experience for me...In fact, I feel like pinching myself every day and say.Hey! there's someone inside you! You're going to be a mother!!!!! I'm going to be a mother....Woohh...I'm happy that I've been able to give my beloved hubby a child but I really am scared of being a mother... Will I be a good mother? I don;t think I have that maternal instinct... People used to say to me that I'll be a good wife and mother...how can they tell?It's almost the end of my first trimester....but I still don't get the feeling yet... I am a selfish mother..that I can say... this pregnancy has had its effects on me, big time!!!! I used to love food...now I have less desire to eat.. I only eat only I'm hungry... I despise veges..they make me sick, I want to throw up! I dread cooking which I used to love... I am bored!!!!!!! I guess everybody feels the same when they got pregnant.. It's just me who like to complaint alot...
At the earlier stage, I was excited of what to get for the baby, and asked for lots of baby catalouge's which I could put my finger on, then.. the feeling faded away.. what's wrong with me? Am I depressed??????I guess it's only the hormone doing its thing on me...